Kitchen Girrrls
Monday, February 21, 2011
Friday, February 18, 2011
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
What the fuck is queer as fuck?
Queer as Fuck began as a panel formed by masculine identified female born people. The purpose was to discuss how punk was a way to find strength in difference, a way to refuse societal definitions of how a girl should act, and a way to turn being an incorrigible freak into an actual lifestyle choice. It was also to discuss how, for many gender deviants, a punk identity was a first step on the lifelong road of opposition to normality and complacency.” -Rocko Bulldagger
Love is my politic
“I want to live in a world where there isn’t a hierarchy of relationships, where romantic love isn’t assumed to be more important than other kinds, where folks can center any relationships they want whether it be their relationship to their spiritual practice, kids, lovers, friends, etc. and not have some notion that it’s more or less important because of who or what’s in focus. I want to feel like I can develop intimacy with people whether we are sleeping together or not that I will be cared for whether I am romantically involved with someone or not. I want a community that takes interdependency seriously that doesn’t assume that it’s only a familial or romantic relationship responsibility to be there for each other. I didn’t just dream this way of relating to each other up. Other cultures and communities throughout time have had more options in terms of how they construct connection. And we are doing it now. Folks are creating interdependent relationships and community that disrupt popular perceptions of appropriate partnering. I just wonder what it will take to get more of us to honestly evaluate the realities of our love and determine whether we are actually getting what we want. Love is abundant, not scarce. Why would we ever want to limit or narrow its flow?”
- crunk feminist collective
Friday, February 4, 2011
Thursday, February 3, 2011
12 22 10
Miranda July is ACTUALLY updating her website and holy shit she has a MOVIE coming out!!!
"As it turns out, we can’t anticipate the movie premiere every single second of the day. In fact, that’s a pretty good way to get a stomach ache. Lets turn instead to some things I didn’t have time to show you before.
I wrote a new book! No, just kidding, it’s only a book cover. This was part of a series of bookcovers made by artists for Opening Ceremony in celebration of the NY Art Book Fair. You can still get them here. Marcel Dzama and Spike Jonze collaborated on one that involves sleepy penises. I was in a kind of dark place when I made mine, so it’s possible you should not use it to cover a high school text book (or the sleepy penises for that matter.) This one is covering Maurice, by E.M. Forster, which just happened to be the exact right size. But is also a really good book." - Miranda July
"As it turns out, we can’t anticipate the movie premiere every single second of the day. In fact, that’s a pretty good way to get a stomach ache. Lets turn instead to some things I didn’t have time to show you before.
I wrote a new book! No, just kidding, it’s only a book cover. This was part of a series of bookcovers made by artists for Opening Ceremony in celebration of the NY Art Book Fair. You can still get them here. Marcel Dzama and Spike Jonze collaborated on one that involves sleepy penises. I was in a kind of dark place when I made mine, so it’s possible you should not use it to cover a high school text book (or the sleepy penises for that matter.) This one is covering Maurice, by E.M. Forster, which just happened to be the exact right size. But is also a really good book." - Miranda July
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
“That song is our most sensitive and emotional, as it’s about how complicated it is to try to have a baby when you’re queer. It came out of this place where I was feeling bad about myself, that I’m not rich enough to have a baby with someone. It’s weird how it’s this dance track and it’s about not getting what you want because of who you are.”
— JD Samson of MEN, explaining her band’s song “Credit Card Babie$” to the Advocate. Go buy the album so JD can get rich and make babies with Sia already
via cinnamon hearts
Saturday, January 29, 2011
On the Argument That Trans Women are Triggering
When people use the old “trans women can’t be in women’s space because they are triggering” argument I just want to stab myself, or possibly someone else, in the eye with a rusty fork.
You know the one: “we can’t have trans women in our domestic violence shelter because they look like men” or “trans women can come to our play party, we guess, but they have to keep their panties on because their genitals are evil phallic symbols of oppression which trigger us (never mind all the CAFAB butches and bois rocking out with their cocks out at all our events).”
There is just so much wrong with this I can hardly even begin to unpack it—
There’s the assumption that all trans women look a certain way. There’s cissexist ideals of what a woman looks like. There’s the idea that what a trans woman looks like is more important than her right to access services for women (and therefore more important than the fact that she IS a woman at all). There’s all the cissexist junk around genitals. There’s the non-consensual projecting of ‘male power’ and oppression onto somebody who is not male and is in fact oppressed by the patriarchy… on and on and on…
There’s all that, and then there’s also the REALLY slimy trick of trying to frame trans exclusion as a freaking DISABILITY ACCESS ISSUE.
RANT ABOUT POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER AHEAD
I have PTSD. I actually get triggered. And this argument makes me want to scream: You keep saying that word ‘trigger.’ I do not think it means what you think it means.
I can get triggered by ANYTHING. Some of my personal triggers include: yuppie guys with pony tails, motel rooms, tie dye (I am not freaking kidding!), certain songs, any loud or sudden noise at all, and people coming up from behind me. I have known other people with PTSD whose triggers included slightly browned bananas, balloons, and all kinds of other random things you can’t possible anticipate would trigger anyone.
Basically, everyone’s trauma is different, so everyone’s triggers are different.
You cannot co-opt our triggers neatly into one political position— specifically, cissexist pseudofeminism. They will not fit. Some of us may indeed be triggered by that trans woman over there, but some of us are equally likely to be triggered by that mega entitled butch over there, or by the shirt that you are wearing. And guess what? Most of us have realized that our triggers actually have nothing to do with the people and things who bring them on.
Making a space “accessible” for people with PTSD by eliminating all conceivable triggers is not POSSIBLE. ANYTHING can be a trigger.
This is EXTRA SPECIALLY HOLY FUCK TRUE when the space in question is a big old kinky play party with people screaming, fucking, bleeding, getting hit, tied up, held down, etc. all over the place!
People with PTSD who choose to enter those spaces have probably worked through their issues enough to feel ready.
In the case of a rape crises center or domestic violence shelter, the situation is even more disgusting— it privileges the hypothetical triggers of cis women over trans women’s actually safety.
Always, always, cis women’s tirggers are more important than trans women’s.
I hear a lot of people throwing the word “triggering” around who don’t seem to understand what it means. Being “triggered” does not mean “feeling kind of freaked out” or “being squicked” or “being reminded of something unpleasant or painful.” When I say I am triggered I mean I am in a physical state of panic when the adrenaline really gets going, my heart is racing, and my reptile brain genuinely thinks I AM GOING TO DIE.
Is that REALLY what you mean?
Or do you actually mean people will start recoiling in transphobic disgust and fear from the trans woman quietly standing in a corner feeling uncomfortable and wishing somebody would talk to her at your (fucking awful) party? Do you mean people will feel weirded out, grossed out, and phobic? Do you mean they will feel “unsafe” because they’ve absorbed a cissexist idea of what a woman is and have been taught that trans women are dangerous perverts?
Say what you mean, transphobes— and keep my fucking disability out of it.
found via ------->
You know the one: “we can’t have trans women in our domestic violence shelter because they look like men” or “trans women can come to our play party, we guess, but they have to keep their panties on because their genitals are evil phallic symbols of oppression which trigger us (never mind all the CAFAB butches and bois rocking out with their cocks out at all our events).”
There is just so much wrong with this I can hardly even begin to unpack it—
There’s the assumption that all trans women look a certain way. There’s cissexist ideals of what a woman looks like. There’s the idea that what a trans woman looks like is more important than her right to access services for women (and therefore more important than the fact that she IS a woman at all). There’s all the cissexist junk around genitals. There’s the non-consensual projecting of ‘male power’ and oppression onto somebody who is not male and is in fact oppressed by the patriarchy… on and on and on…
There’s all that, and then there’s also the REALLY slimy trick of trying to frame trans exclusion as a freaking DISABILITY ACCESS ISSUE.
RANT ABOUT POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER AHEAD
I have PTSD. I actually get triggered. And this argument makes me want to scream: You keep saying that word ‘trigger.’ I do not think it means what you think it means.
I can get triggered by ANYTHING. Some of my personal triggers include: yuppie guys with pony tails, motel rooms, tie dye (I am not freaking kidding!), certain songs, any loud or sudden noise at all, and people coming up from behind me. I have known other people with PTSD whose triggers included slightly browned bananas, balloons, and all kinds of other random things you can’t possible anticipate would trigger anyone.
Basically, everyone’s trauma is different, so everyone’s triggers are different.
You cannot co-opt our triggers neatly into one political position— specifically, cissexist pseudofeminism. They will not fit. Some of us may indeed be triggered by that trans woman over there, but some of us are equally likely to be triggered by that mega entitled butch over there, or by the shirt that you are wearing. And guess what? Most of us have realized that our triggers actually have nothing to do with the people and things who bring them on.
Making a space “accessible” for people with PTSD by eliminating all conceivable triggers is not POSSIBLE. ANYTHING can be a trigger.
This is EXTRA SPECIALLY HOLY FUCK TRUE when the space in question is a big old kinky play party with people screaming, fucking, bleeding, getting hit, tied up, held down, etc. all over the place!
People with PTSD who choose to enter those spaces have probably worked through their issues enough to feel ready.
In the case of a rape crises center or domestic violence shelter, the situation is even more disgusting— it privileges the hypothetical triggers of cis women over trans women’s actually safety.
Always, always, cis women’s tirggers are more important than trans women’s.
I hear a lot of people throwing the word “triggering” around who don’t seem to understand what it means. Being “triggered” does not mean “feeling kind of freaked out” or “being squicked” or “being reminded of something unpleasant or painful.” When I say I am triggered I mean I am in a physical state of panic when the adrenaline really gets going, my heart is racing, and my reptile brain genuinely thinks I AM GOING TO DIE.
Is that REALLY what you mean?
Or do you actually mean people will start recoiling in transphobic disgust and fear from the trans woman quietly standing in a corner feeling uncomfortable and wishing somebody would talk to her at your (fucking awful) party? Do you mean people will feel weirded out, grossed out, and phobic? Do you mean they will feel “unsafe” because they’ve absorbed a cissexist idea of what a woman is and have been taught that trans women are dangerous perverts?
Say what you mean, transphobes— and keep my fucking disability out of it.
found via ------->
Tokenized: Colonization, Gender and the Self
We do not form our identities in a vacuum. Instead, they come from the latest in historical progressions (and transgressions).
There are, broadly, two kinds of transition – the “right” kind and the “wrong” kind. Trans folk are obviously not capable making decisions about our lives and our bodies the way that other people are. Therefore we must submit to the decisions of institutions and professionals. That is, if you are privileged enough to be able to afford those services. If not, well, you can only be the “wrong” kind.
At each step some medical or psychological authority must certify that you are the “right” kind of trans person. But what does that certification really entail? In a word, conformity. In another, colonization.
While presentation is a key part of this standard, it is really more about the relationship between past experiences and current identity.
There must be demonstrable evidence of suffering, and more importantly, that you have successfully scrubbed away your gendered past. If you are able to sufficiently demonstrate that you have conformed to the expectations of who you should be, then there is a reward – something that takes you one step closer to feeling ok about your body.
Still, there is an interesting interaction between these institutional and personal desires, between colonizing yourself and being colonized. There is a base assumption of what it means to be masculine or feminine, and how that plays out in everyday life.
When I first started to explore my own sense of gender, I struggled with what it meant to be feminine. I had internalized a lot of the cultural messages pertaining to women. Was I required to wear make up? How about skirts and dresses? Did I have to like men? Before long I began to discipline myself in both my femininity and my masculinity. I was in a constant state of shame, either for failing at the impossible standards of femininity, or thinking that I was betraying the masculinity that I had been born into.
Eventually I was able to gain access to the institutions of approval. Initially, they were concerned about how I wore both of the genders. They were hesitant to give me the certification of conformity. So I worked harder at being the woman they thought I should be. Still, I was not the woman that I wanted to be but rather the woman that society said I should be.
Now the struggle is opposite. I am expected to deny that my first twenty odd years of life even existed. Life begins at transition.
A lot of that denial has to do with safety. Or the fact that some people cannot be counted one to respect my identity once they know my past. Instead they impose their own conceptions who they think I should be, always forcing me into identities I do not claim.
At the other end of the spectrum, it doesn’t matter whether or not I follow the rules laid down by culture, politics, or any other system because I have already broken the cardinal rule – you do not cross the gender line. It is rare to have a day that where I don’t feel as if the strange swirl of my gender identity is being beaten out of me. Every where I look, the general consensus is that I do not fit. Something as simple as proving who I am can become an arduous task, depending on who is looking at the id. I have been fired from jobs (if I could even get them at all) for violating that one rule. Going to see a doctor, even one of the aforementioned professionals, means often being humiliated and maybe even degraded. At the very least, it means not being understood.
Even fellow queers take part, telling me that they know better who, and what, I am. And more importantly, that I do not fit within their world view.
These colonists are always trying to drive those of us who exist in ambiguity out of the space that is rightfully ours, because our very presence can represent a challenge to the very idea that gender difference is so entirely vast and immutable.
There is no such thing as “post-colonial.” We are always left to deal with the destruction and internalized ideology. Instead resistance can only mean identifying the physical, psychological, and emotional scars in order to know the terrain. They cannot, and should not, be forgotten or erased but rather accepted and embraced as the starting point toward self worth.
via The New Gay
There are, broadly, two kinds of transition – the “right” kind and the “wrong” kind. Trans folk are obviously not capable making decisions about our lives and our bodies the way that other people are. Therefore we must submit to the decisions of institutions and professionals. That is, if you are privileged enough to be able to afford those services. If not, well, you can only be the “wrong” kind.
At each step some medical or psychological authority must certify that you are the “right” kind of trans person. But what does that certification really entail? In a word, conformity. In another, colonization.
While presentation is a key part of this standard, it is really more about the relationship between past experiences and current identity.
There must be demonstrable evidence of suffering, and more importantly, that you have successfully scrubbed away your gendered past. If you are able to sufficiently demonstrate that you have conformed to the expectations of who you should be, then there is a reward – something that takes you one step closer to feeling ok about your body.
Still, there is an interesting interaction between these institutional and personal desires, between colonizing yourself and being colonized. There is a base assumption of what it means to be masculine or feminine, and how that plays out in everyday life.
When I first started to explore my own sense of gender, I struggled with what it meant to be feminine. I had internalized a lot of the cultural messages pertaining to women. Was I required to wear make up? How about skirts and dresses? Did I have to like men? Before long I began to discipline myself in both my femininity and my masculinity. I was in a constant state of shame, either for failing at the impossible standards of femininity, or thinking that I was betraying the masculinity that I had been born into.
Eventually I was able to gain access to the institutions of approval. Initially, they were concerned about how I wore both of the genders. They were hesitant to give me the certification of conformity. So I worked harder at being the woman they thought I should be. Still, I was not the woman that I wanted to be but rather the woman that society said I should be.
Now the struggle is opposite. I am expected to deny that my first twenty odd years of life even existed. Life begins at transition.
A lot of that denial has to do with safety. Or the fact that some people cannot be counted one to respect my identity once they know my past. Instead they impose their own conceptions who they think I should be, always forcing me into identities I do not claim.
At the other end of the spectrum, it doesn’t matter whether or not I follow the rules laid down by culture, politics, or any other system because I have already broken the cardinal rule – you do not cross the gender line. It is rare to have a day that where I don’t feel as if the strange swirl of my gender identity is being beaten out of me. Every where I look, the general consensus is that I do not fit. Something as simple as proving who I am can become an arduous task, depending on who is looking at the id. I have been fired from jobs (if I could even get them at all) for violating that one rule. Going to see a doctor, even one of the aforementioned professionals, means often being humiliated and maybe even degraded. At the very least, it means not being understood.
Even fellow queers take part, telling me that they know better who, and what, I am. And more importantly, that I do not fit within their world view.
These colonists are always trying to drive those of us who exist in ambiguity out of the space that is rightfully ours, because our very presence can represent a challenge to the very idea that gender difference is so entirely vast and immutable.
There is no such thing as “post-colonial.” We are always left to deal with the destruction and internalized ideology. Instead resistance can only mean identifying the physical, psychological, and emotional scars in order to know the terrain. They cannot, and should not, be forgotten or erased but rather accepted and embraced as the starting point toward self worth.
via The New Gay
Hey everyone! Check out Elisha’s all new Queer Love Cards that will be sold on Etsy! There are four different sets, “Hey Homo” “Hey Beautiful” & “Hey Handsome.” Each set are only $10.
Be sure to check out more of her stuff in her Etsy shop including the 2011 Calendar: The Illustrated Gentleman.
“The cards are about a queer way of being in love, with things like butches saying “Hey Handsome,” transfags saying “Hey Beautiful,” and genderqueers saying “Hayy” and “I Like Your Cardigan.”” -Elisha Lim
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Good for Her - Sex and Disability
I'm here to share some work I did for Good for Her around sex and disability. It was part of an internship/service learning placement I did for a Disability Studies seminar I took with Rod Michalko. Here is 1 of 4 posts I wrote. Feedback would be lovely!
Sex and disability. These are two words that we don’t often hear together, in the same sentence or even conversation. For those of you who are disabled, I’m sure you’re well aware of the disturbingly common misconception that disabled folks are asexual and incapable of having sex or being sexy. You also probably know this couldn’t be farther from the truth. Just like there are countless ways of expressing our sensuality, there are a diversity of ways of being disabled. While the dominant mindset is still Disabled Equals Asexual, there has been a lot of work in recent years by disabled activists and their allies to promote sex-positivity in the disabled community and disseminate information to the masses (thank you, Internet).
When it comes to sex and disability (including masturbation and sex with a partner(s)), there is absolutely no one-size-fits-all product or way of ‘doing it.’ The most importation things to remember when looking for toys that will work for you or your partner (or the both of you!) are:
a) knowing what you want
b) knowing what will work best for you/her/him
c) a sense of imagination and creativity
Sexual expression is always learning processes, whether you’re disabled or not. Communicating and understanding your body are the keys to maximizing your sexual pleasure, whether it’s by yourself or with a partner(s). Sex should be fun… and it should be an option for everyone. So, through the creation of this resource guide, everyone will be able to partake in the fun!!
Check back next week for another blog post and an update on the sexy disability product guide.
Originally posted on Good for Her's blog.
Sex and disability. These are two words that we don’t often hear together, in the same sentence or even conversation. For those of you who are disabled, I’m sure you’re well aware of the disturbingly common misconception that disabled folks are asexual and incapable of having sex or being sexy. You also probably know this couldn’t be farther from the truth. Just like there are countless ways of expressing our sensuality, there are a diversity of ways of being disabled. While the dominant mindset is still Disabled Equals Asexual, there has been a lot of work in recent years by disabled activists and their allies to promote sex-positivity in the disabled community and disseminate information to the masses (thank you, Internet).
When it comes to sex and disability (including masturbation and sex with a partner(s)), there is absolutely no one-size-fits-all product or way of ‘doing it.’ The most importation things to remember when looking for toys that will work for you or your partner (or the both of you!) are:
a) knowing what you want
b) knowing what will work best for you/her/him
c) a sense of imagination and creativity
Sexual expression is always learning processes, whether you’re disabled or not. Communicating and understanding your body are the keys to maximizing your sexual pleasure, whether it’s by yourself or with a partner(s). Sex should be fun… and it should be an option for everyone. So, through the creation of this resource guide, everyone will be able to partake in the fun!!
Check back next week for another blog post and an update on the sexy disability product guide.
Originally posted on Good for Her's blog.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
What Does a Feminist Look Like?: A Transmasculine Perspective with a Challenge
"what's your role in stopping, interrupting, problematizing?"
“We all benefit from co-creating a world in which gender liberation is a reality for all people, all bodies, everyone.”
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Queer Family
Over the last week I have had the flu, its been awful and i haven't had any biological family to support me. However, i do have a queer and adopted family that has lovingly supported me. The idea of biological family and its inherent normative structures of support is something i have never known or identified with, but it is a theme that i often grieve over when I reach out to my bio-family. I identify as a queer-survivor of sexual abuse and trauma; being able to tell my own story has often been made impossible for me. Having space to self identify and determine my experience has recently become an adopted gift and learned consciousness. Today a friend posted Leslie Feinberg's tumblr page on facebook, and its incredible how Leslies story is one that i can relate to through many themes; self determination, biological family versus adopted family and the colonization of queer struggle. This page is definitly worth sharing.
While a hostile relative re-writes my life: ‘Who is, and is not, my family’
by Leslie Feinberg
[please reblog]
In autumn 2010, Knopf published a “transgender” themed young adult novel. The author, Catherine Ryan Hyde, is an estranged relative of mine.
The analysis of the strengths and weaknesses of Hyde’s young adult fiction novel will come from those who are living the identities, and oppressions to which she has applied her imagination.
However, as part of the media coverage and publicity tour for the release of the young adult novel, Hyde claims much of her expertise and authority for writing her “transgender”-themed young adult novel as based on my life and identity.
The author is a relative with an axe to grind. When she claims me as kin in order to counter-narrate my life, I am forced to get up out of a sick bed in order to respond in writing.
Since I became acutely ill in October 2007, it has been very hard for me to write, or to speak. So it is opportunistic and unconscionable that a hostile relative would take this opportunity to re-tell my life in a way that changes my sex, mis-describes my gender expression, and closets my sexuality. Hyde also attempts to silence me politically as a revolutionary, reasserts the dominant legal control of the biological family, and ignores and disrespects my chosen family.
My verbal and written request for no further contact has been violated by my relatives numerous times over the last forty years. So I do not rely on them to respect my wishes. Instead, I have clarified and strengthened my legal papers, and I am making this statement public: My living biological relatives—Irving David Feinberg, Betty Vance Hyde, and Catherine Ryan Hyde—are not my family. They do not speak for me.
The Joint Commission on Accreditation of Healthcare Organizations (JCAHO) defines “family” as: “The person(s) who plays a significant role in the individual’s [patient’s] life. This may include a person(s) not legally related to the individual.”
Irving David Feinberg, Betty Vance Hyde, and Catherine Ryan Hyde have not played any significant role in my adult life. I have not seen or spoken to my parents in 40 years. Catherine Ryan Hyde was a child when I left home as a youth, and has only met me a handful of times in her adult lifetime.
Catherine Ryan Hyde’s narrations about my identity and early family life to audiences and media on her young adult novel book tour is not the first time that she or other relatives have narrated hostile accounts of my life—in person and in print.
Who is, and who is not, my ‘family’
My estranged biological relatives know very little about the decades of my adult life. They are strangers, by my choice, because of their history of bigotry and abusive behaviors toward me.
Yet the capitalist state often cedes legal power to blood relatives by default. So, I’ve had to struggle to assert legal independence from the white, patriarchal, heterosexually-modeled nuclear family into which I was born.
For four decades I have been forced to create and revise sets of legal forms for every state in the U.S. in which I’ve lived or sought medical care. These foundational documents state in clear language that I have been legally autonomous from my birth family since I reached the age of legal consent.
My documents state that Irving David Feinberg, Betty Vance Hyde, and Catherine Ryan Hyde have no legal rights in my life.
My legal papers also spell out clearly who does have the right to speak for me if I am unable to speak for myself.
Minnie Bruce Pratt has been my family, legally and in life, since 1992. As lovers, we have shared a home, life and struggle—in sickness and in health. We are domestic partners. We are civil union’d. Yet the state and federal government discriminate against our same-sex economic family unit by denying more than a thousand of the benefits that recognition of same-sex rights as a civil “marriage” certificate would provide.
Because I am female, and in a same-sex relationship, I have to live and travel with legal documents that expressly state who is, and who is not, my family.
Even chosen family members who travel with their legal documents intact can find themselves barred from visiting their loved one in an emergency room, while vindictive relatives who are virtual strangers can proceed to the bedside to make life-and-death decisions.I carry a hospital visitation authorization, the new Medical Orders for Life-Sustaining Treatment (MOLST), my domestic partnership and civil union papers, advanced directives, living will and last will & testament. In addition, I carry a copy of caregivers’ rights, and requests for secular-based care.
I have to legally state in paperwork that Minnie Bruce Pratt is my health care proxy, together with my attorney—who has taught issues of law and transgender. They have my powers of attorney. Based on legal documents that I’ve worked hard to prepare, my chosen family would speak for me if I were unable to advocate for myself.
Minnie Bruce and I both have to carry each other’s documents at all times, as well.
Catherine Ryan Hyde is attempting to undermine all my painstaking documentation of chosen family relationships, by claiming blood ties give her intimate knowledge of my life and identity, and the right to re-write them.
Self-expression of oppressions,
Versus bashing counter-narrative
On her author promotional tour, Catherine Ryan Hyde is developing an embryonic biography of my life—fictionalized and unauthorized—to which I give no consent. Her assertions are all easily found on the web in a google search.
“This is totally my story to tell,” Catherine Ryan Hyde publicly maintains. She claims insider knowledge, because, she says, she grew up with a “transgender sibling.”
She also claims that because I have written and spoken publicly about my own oppressions and life’s struggles, my life is now public domain for her imagination. This argument draws an equal sign between the right of oppressed individuals to self-expression, and the bigoted “voice-over” that contradicts and denies those oppressed identities and life experiences.
Hyde claims she learned acceptance from an early age because she “grew up” with a “transgender sibling.” However, she must admit she is either a virtual stranger to my life, or is maliciously re-writing my identity—or both.
Catherine Ryan Hyde appropriates the description of my life in order to contradict my identity. In her commentary, she co-opts my life’s journey, changes my sex, denies my pronoun(s) of choice, mis-describes my gender expression, and closets my declared sexuality.
I can say with certainty that if anyone claims “insider” knowledge of my life based on patriarchal blood relations—or claims to have been a long-lost “good friend,” or to have “dated” me long ago—in order to deny and obfuscate my life’s struggles, then I can guarantee you that the “love” is not mutual.
Read more on Leslie's Tumblr
While a hostile relative re-writes my life: ‘Who is, and is not, my family’
by Leslie Feinberg
[please reblog]
In autumn 2010, Knopf published a “transgender” themed young adult novel. The author, Catherine Ryan Hyde, is an estranged relative of mine.
The analysis of the strengths and weaknesses of Hyde’s young adult fiction novel will come from those who are living the identities, and oppressions to which she has applied her imagination.
However, as part of the media coverage and publicity tour for the release of the young adult novel, Hyde claims much of her expertise and authority for writing her “transgender”-themed young adult novel as based on my life and identity.
The author is a relative with an axe to grind. When she claims me as kin in order to counter-narrate my life, I am forced to get up out of a sick bed in order to respond in writing.
Since I became acutely ill in October 2007, it has been very hard for me to write, or to speak. So it is opportunistic and unconscionable that a hostile relative would take this opportunity to re-tell my life in a way that changes my sex, mis-describes my gender expression, and closets my sexuality. Hyde also attempts to silence me politically as a revolutionary, reasserts the dominant legal control of the biological family, and ignores and disrespects my chosen family.
My verbal and written request for no further contact has been violated by my relatives numerous times over the last forty years. So I do not rely on them to respect my wishes. Instead, I have clarified and strengthened my legal papers, and I am making this statement public: My living biological relatives—Irving David Feinberg, Betty Vance Hyde, and Catherine Ryan Hyde—are not my family. They do not speak for me.
The Joint Commission on Accreditation of Healthcare Organizations (JCAHO) defines “family” as: “The person(s) who plays a significant role in the individual’s [patient’s] life. This may include a person(s) not legally related to the individual.”
Irving David Feinberg, Betty Vance Hyde, and Catherine Ryan Hyde have not played any significant role in my adult life. I have not seen or spoken to my parents in 40 years. Catherine Ryan Hyde was a child when I left home as a youth, and has only met me a handful of times in her adult lifetime.
Catherine Ryan Hyde’s narrations about my identity and early family life to audiences and media on her young adult novel book tour is not the first time that she or other relatives have narrated hostile accounts of my life—in person and in print.
Who is, and who is not, my ‘family’
My estranged biological relatives know very little about the decades of my adult life. They are strangers, by my choice, because of their history of bigotry and abusive behaviors toward me.
Yet the capitalist state often cedes legal power to blood relatives by default. So, I’ve had to struggle to assert legal independence from the white, patriarchal, heterosexually-modeled nuclear family into which I was born.
For four decades I have been forced to create and revise sets of legal forms for every state in the U.S. in which I’ve lived or sought medical care. These foundational documents state in clear language that I have been legally autonomous from my birth family since I reached the age of legal consent.
My documents state that Irving David Feinberg, Betty Vance Hyde, and Catherine Ryan Hyde have no legal rights in my life.
My legal papers also spell out clearly who does have the right to speak for me if I am unable to speak for myself.
Minnie Bruce Pratt has been my family, legally and in life, since 1992. As lovers, we have shared a home, life and struggle—in sickness and in health. We are domestic partners. We are civil union’d. Yet the state and federal government discriminate against our same-sex economic family unit by denying more than a thousand of the benefits that recognition of same-sex rights as a civil “marriage” certificate would provide.
Because I am female, and in a same-sex relationship, I have to live and travel with legal documents that expressly state who is, and who is not, my family.
Even chosen family members who travel with their legal documents intact can find themselves barred from visiting their loved one in an emergency room, while vindictive relatives who are virtual strangers can proceed to the bedside to make life-and-death decisions.I carry a hospital visitation authorization, the new Medical Orders for Life-Sustaining Treatment (MOLST), my domestic partnership and civil union papers, advanced directives, living will and last will & testament. In addition, I carry a copy of caregivers’ rights, and requests for secular-based care.
I have to legally state in paperwork that Minnie Bruce Pratt is my health care proxy, together with my attorney—who has taught issues of law and transgender. They have my powers of attorney. Based on legal documents that I’ve worked hard to prepare, my chosen family would speak for me if I were unable to advocate for myself.
Minnie Bruce and I both have to carry each other’s documents at all times, as well.
Catherine Ryan Hyde is attempting to undermine all my painstaking documentation of chosen family relationships, by claiming blood ties give her intimate knowledge of my life and identity, and the right to re-write them.
Self-expression of oppressions,
Versus bashing counter-narrative
On her author promotional tour, Catherine Ryan Hyde is developing an embryonic biography of my life—fictionalized and unauthorized—to which I give no consent. Her assertions are all easily found on the web in a google search.
“This is totally my story to tell,” Catherine Ryan Hyde publicly maintains. She claims insider knowledge, because, she says, she grew up with a “transgender sibling.”
She also claims that because I have written and spoken publicly about my own oppressions and life’s struggles, my life is now public domain for her imagination. This argument draws an equal sign between the right of oppressed individuals to self-expression, and the bigoted “voice-over” that contradicts and denies those oppressed identities and life experiences.
Hyde claims she learned acceptance from an early age because she “grew up” with a “transgender sibling.” However, she must admit she is either a virtual stranger to my life, or is maliciously re-writing my identity—or both.
Catherine Ryan Hyde appropriates the description of my life in order to contradict my identity. In her commentary, she co-opts my life’s journey, changes my sex, denies my pronoun(s) of choice, mis-describes my gender expression, and closets my declared sexuality.
I can say with certainty that if anyone claims “insider” knowledge of my life based on patriarchal blood relations—or claims to have been a long-lost “good friend,” or to have “dated” me long ago—in order to deny and obfuscate my life’s struggles, then I can guarantee you that the “love” is not mutual.
Read more on Leslie's Tumblr
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Campbell X talks being black and queer and her film, "Stud Life"
Artist filmmaker and collaborator Campbell X is one of those badass queers I wish populated the world more frequently. The force behind BlackmanVision production company in the UK, she’s created a number of award winning film projects, blending fiction and documentary into her own successful brand of storytelling. Her films give voice to such niche communities as black women who participate in the dancehall music scene despite its misogynistic overtones, as in Ragga Gyal D’Bout!, or create a portrait of black lesbian love during the Harlem Renaissance as in BD Women.
This year, Campbell is wrapping up on her first narrative feature, Stud Life, which pays homage to the relationships between lesbians and gay men. She recently spoke with Queerious about her new film, the obstacles she’s faced and her advice on how to persevere.
When talking about the particular aesthetic of her films, Campbell understands the effect her perspective can have. “My films challenge minority communities out of their comfort zone,” she says. “Usually people get angry with me when they see my work or they cry. I always try to give visual pleasure through the use of colour and I steal from fashion, pop promos and old movies. I try to create a Black queer aesthetic which means I reject the white LGBT way of looking at Black LGBT culture in particular and Black culture in general. And that is a challenge because I am going against the grain in many ways.”
Her unique view of race and gender populates all of her work, and Stud Life is no different. The film’s logo — a stiletto high heel paired with high top sneaker — features the tag line “Who did you wake up with today? Your lover or your best friend?” Campbell explains her desire to illustrate the otherwise absent representation of lesbians and gay men as friends: “LGBT films tend to be mono-sexual … Boys with boys, girls with girls. It is not real life. Well, not my life anyway. I live and love in a mixed world of gender and race ... Stud Life stars a dark-skinned stud and her white gay boyfriend who is comfortable with raw urban Black culture. These are two types of people one never sees in LGBT movies.”
Campbell also does an awesome job of calling out media that lacks the inclusion of queers and people of color, as evidenced by the 100 Film Power List on BlackmanVision’s site. A direct response to the whitewashed and ho-hum 100 Film Power List printed in the Guardian, Campbell’s list gives shout out to everyone from Rose Troche to Oprah to Jodie Foster, and even AfterEllen.com.
BlackmanVision also features such prize posts as her experience casting a genderqueer role in Stud Life, and the must-read Radical Film Manifesto, a list of advice for aspiring film makers (or anyone creative, really). “I, queers particularly of colour, need to get out there and make something, especially those that have skills,” she says in the interview. “Making films is easier but making great polished films is hard. However, the more you do it the better you will get. So I would encourage people to use whatever is at hand to make a film. Little ones and big ones. Narrative and experimental.”
It’s smart advice that has doubtlessly gotten Campbell X to where she is today, and then some. Stud Life is currently being shopped around to festivals, so there’s no word yet on when it will be available. You can catch clips of some of her films at BlackmanVision, and keep up to date with her projects through Facebook. Oh, and if someone doesn’t nominate Campbell X for Sinclair Sexsmith’s Top Hot Butches, I sure as heck will.
Via After Ellen
Friday, January 21, 2011
DAMN. Alex Prager evokes the most sumptuous associations for me: Cindy Sherman, Quentin Tarantino, Hitchcock, John Waters and every (insert genre)-spoitation film of the 1970s. The colors, the casualness of the shots, the sinister details of the compositions — hanging ropes, bum fires, drowning — I love it.
Tonight I am so sick i feel like crying and curling myself into fetal position for hours. The thought of decorating my "future home" with textured paintings ( not prints ) made me feel slightly better. I'm really digging the messy and beautifully textured women in Alison Schulnik's work.
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